Fish Stories and Jokes


I was sitting down along the lake enjoying the cool breeze off the water, and admiring the view, when I noticed down the bank about 30 yards there was a squirrel sitting on a limb, overhanging the water about two feet, eating a hickory nut. I sat there for a couple minutes watching him and about that time the biggest large mouth bass I ever seen jumped out of the water and ate that squirrel. And do you know what? About a minute later that bass jumped out of the water and set another hickory nut back up on that limb.

The Tennessee State Department of Fish and Wildlife is advising hikers, hunters, fishermen, and golfers to take extra pre-cautions and be on the alert for bears while in your immediate area.

They advise people to wear noise-producing devices such as little bells on their clothing to alert but not startle the bears unexpectedly.

They also advise you to carry pepper spray in case of an encounter with a bear. It is also a good idea to watch for signs of bear activity.

People should be able to recognize the difference between black bear and grizzly bear droppings.

Black bear droppings are smaller and contain mountain berries and possibly squirrel fur.

Grizzly bear droppings have bells in them and smell like pepper spray.

True Story
Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour east of Bakersfield, California, some folks, new to boating, were having a problem. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn't get their brand new 22 ft. Bayliner to perform. It wouldn't get on a plane at all, and it was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power was applied. After about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted to a nearby marina, thinking someone there could tell them what was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed everything in perfect working condition. The engine ran fine, the outdrive went up and down, the prop was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard...........
Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer.

Submitted by Sandie

While fishing one summer on Douglas lake in the Swansylvania area, with my mom, and my little brother. We were all just out enjoying the summer day, my little brother was swimming and my mom was riding in an inner tube while fishing at the same time when she sat the hook in something, and with a look of surprise she took of up into the hollow and then back down past the dock on which me and Brandon (my little brother) were rolling on laughing at her as she went screaming by. Finally after about 45 miniutes of her screaming at us to grab her or the fishing pole she finally landed the 17lbs. Carp which she was not so pleased with!!!!!!!!!!

This was submitted by one of our visitors

"Lucky Isn't the Word"
By Randy Heavin

My good friend Don and I spent the better part of 2003 bass fishing onalmost every lake in Oklahoma. Don had a so called lucky crank bait that hehad used for many years and he was tying it on again. He called this oldlure, "lucky". It was the only bait he would ever use. Don seamed to catcheverything in the lake while using "lucky". It got the point that I wasroutinely surfing the internet trying to find one of these vintage rebelcrank baits for myself, and my attempts always came up shallow. One daywhile fishing, Don snagged his lucky old crank bait on a submerged object.He worked for 30 minutes trying to set the bait free. Finally, the linebroke and the bait was gone. I was so happy but didn't want Don to know it.Yes, finally I could catch more fish than my friend. We came back the spotof the loss three more times that day and we never found lucky. Don was toreup about it for months. About 6 months later we were back on oldSportsman's lake and I was catching all the fish and I was rubbing it ingood. Don said, "well if I had old Lucky back I would smoke you good". Ilaughed and said, " well you don't and Lucky is gone forever". No soonerthan I finished my sentence, Don start yelling and you would never believewhy? Like a demon out of the murky depths, and right there next to our boat,that darn lure popped up as if to say, "I have missed you, I am back, andlets fish". Don almost fell from our boat when retrieving his trusty oldfriend. He couldn't wait to tie on that bait. Yes, you guessed it! The endof the day tally was Don 16 Bass and one piece of crap crank bait, and me, 4Bass and a real bad attitude. Fish on!

If you have fish stories or fishing jokes you would like to share, please send them to and we will post them on this page.

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